Conquering a broken heart
In a world full of competition, there are only two possible outcomes for every competitive scenario; either you win, or you learn (I don’t believe in losing). And there is an unfortunate truth that all athletes must come to terms with; you are going to learn more than you win. Way more in fact. Even if you take the greatest champions of all time, and look at their careers from childhood to hall of fame, they are going to learn more than they win. This leads to two interesting questions: 1) What do we do once we win? 2) What do we do once we learn?
If you couldn’t tell by the title, this article will be focusing on the latter. So what happens once we learn? Sadness, frustration, heartbreak. Anyone who has lost a championship game, competition, or failed to accomplish a goal understands these feelings. The important thing, however, is not to avoid it. What is important is how we move on from those feelings. Let me tell you the quick story of how I came to write this article.
For the five months prior to Team USA Trials in 2019, I dedicated every fiber of my being towards training to make the U.S. National Team for the second year in a row. I practiced 4-5 days per week, competed on the weekends, and trained my mental game more than ever before. What happened when January came around? I had a mediocre performance, finished 12th, and was not selected by the Team USA Selection Committee. The next week was the hardest week of my athletic career. I was unable to fall asleep, constantly replaying my blocks over and over again, thinking about what I could’ve done different. And even sleep didn’t bring me peace, as I would have nightmares repeatedly about that week. The thought of not having the chance to qualify for Team USA for another 365 days killed me.
Day in and day out I would try to think of any way I could to conquer this obsession with the past. It wasn’t until two weeks after, when I was falling asleep (ironically enough), that it finally hit me; I didn’t have a next goal. I don’t have any plans to go on the professional tour full-time. So besides the few professional events I compete in every year, and smaller local events, Team USA is all I have. And now that that was nonexistent for the next 12 months, I didn’t know what to do.
Over the course of the next few days, I sat down and created a plan for what I was going to work towards. I concluded that I would never allow myself to go through something like this again. From now on, I will always have something to work towards following my current goal, and I suggest you do the same. And this is isn’t just so you have backup goal for when you learn. It is well documented that many olympians fall into a state of depression following a performance that earns them and their country a medal. Why? Because they have not planned for their time after the Olympics. So sit down, and take the time to decide what you’re going to work towards, and when. It will save you time, effort, and most importantly, sleep.